UCS Reporters
The Dood Abides
Dominus Noster
Ed E. Druckman
Kamal El-Din
Gunther Schnitzel
Chuck Terzella
Walid
Nickfun

 

 

 
New Sex Toy Attracts Investors Warren Buffett and Oprah
 
by NickFun
 
Oprah smiles after using the new vibrating sex toy.
Startup sex toy maker JimmyJane, Inc. has entered the sex toy business with a bang, attracting over $10 million dollars from such high rolling investors as Warren Buffett and Oprah Winfrey.

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NASA Picks Shuttle Trader Magizine to Sell Off Space Shuttles
 
by Kamal El-Din
 
Space ShuttleUnconfirmed sources report that NASA has decided sell off the fleet of Space Shuttles after the program concludes in the coming months. NASA has chosen the private service Shuttle Trader Magazine to handle the sale of the shuttles and all related equipment.

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Supreme Court Approves Sale of United States Government to the Chamber of Commerce
 
by Kamal El-Din
 
Supreme Court Sells America to Corporate Interests(Washington D.C.) Unconfirmed sources are reporting that the United States Supreme court has approved the sale of the U.S. Government to the United States Chamber of Commerce. The deal struck between the conservative court and the Chamber should close in late 2012 for an undisclosed sum of money. The transition from civilian to corporate control of the government should be completed by 2012, when the Chamber will appoint a new president.


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Google's Caffeine Enhanced Search Engine much faster than Regular Google
 
by NickFun
 
A tourist poses putside Google Headquaters
Google, Inc. announced today that it has a new 'caffeine enhanced' search engine that is ten times faster than its old search engine.

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Paramount Dumps Blu-Ray and HD DVD in Favor of Carved Stone Tablets Paramount Dumps Blu-Ray and HD DVD Formats in Favor of Carved Stone Tablets

The New Home of The Beatles! Beatles Spurn iTunes, Publish Music Exclusively on Allofmp3.com

Ova - not just for breakfast anymore The latest indicator of an ailing economy: women selling their eggs to restaurants

World Flower Market in Crisis!

Zero Shortage Threatens Recovery Zero Shortage Threatens Obama Stimulus Plan

 

Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.

 

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