(Hollywood, CA) Is Mom to be Britney Spears becoming the new John Lennnon? According to the singer's stream of consciousness entry for May 10, the Pop Mom wants President Bush to put her in charge of the CIA to "finally get this country's intelligence singing in the key of peace." Further, "putting a military man in that position, unless it's the Army Guy from The Village People, will make the United States about as safe as Sean Preston in a high chair." The statment ends urging fans to e-mail Dick Cheney at "vice_president@whitehouse.gov because that's the only e-mail I could find." So, is it peace activism through performance art, publicity or just raging hormones?
Spears' assistant publicist, Jim Shortz, replied, "Those of you who think Britney couldn't handle the job of keeping secrets, let me ask you one question. Did you know she was pregnant?" Publicity stunt or not, the White House web site is allegedly receiving 2,000 e-mails per hour asking the President to consider Spears, according to a CIA source who spoke to Judith Miller. Ms. Miller is currently being arrested for refusal to name the source. Her only comments, "Here we go again," and "Robert Novak is one lucky bastard."
However, various Spears blog editors, currently being thrust in the media spotlight for no apparent reason as credible sources and having not much else to do now that college finals are over, are commenting. According to the Fundamentalist Christian Spears of Destiny blog, "We applaud and endorse her. Put a good Christian as head of the CIA to bring peace to our world by crucifying the Muslim infidels and have a blessed day." There has also been support from the singer's fringe fan base, as is evidenced from an excerpt from the scat blog Poops! I did it again, "Brit, you just go …to the head of the CIA we mean. Though as a rule we're not for it, it's time to clean up the sh*t."
Spears' assistant publicist went on to say, "This has nothing to do with her second child. Britney just feels it's time to make people aware that love is all you need. As she told me, 'Come on people now, smile on your brother and be a sunshine superman.' How can the President argue with that?" Shortz concluded by saying, "Britney knows she may not get the appointment. But she wants to make people aware that while this current administration has proven that intelligence isn't important it can never be stressed enough."
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Attic Witt.
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