Bush Rallies Support for Pork Initiative
by Dood Abides
Bush unveils the new emblem for his proposed National Pork Service

Luray, VA (APE) - President Bush took a leisural helicopter ride to Shenandoah National Forest in an attempt to rally public support for his plan to pump millions out of some of America's national parks.

"I hope the citizens groups who are concerned about national parks are able to volunteer their time to repair all the nasty trails and remind Congress about what we have done and need to continue to do as good shepherds of our own natural resources," the president said.









Bush claims that proposed selloffs are needed to protect the nation's parks

Bush trumpeted the fact that his new budget reallocates $230 million more from within the $2.4 billion National Parks budget than he requested last year. The funding largely will come from existing budgets for construction and waste management and go towards repairs for crumbling facilities and growing pollution problems. With the proposed selloff of oil and mineral rights in other national parks and subsequent downsizing of actual wilderness area, the president predicted that by 2008 the budget for the Park service would become revenue neutral.

Bush also called for $100 million in federal funds to match corporate ventures into oil and mineral rights management and day to day operations for the parks.

"Congress needs to hear loud and clear how important this issue of oil addiction is," Bush stated.

 
Rate This Item
 
I Liked It
 
Print
4440 Views
 
Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.

Add Your Comments








Comments must be approved before being published.

 

In case You Missed Them...

In Katrina's Wake, George W. Bush Vows To Fight Natures Terrorism

Vachon says he will get naked if he has to Satire Writer Seeks to Make Money

President Bush seen just seconds before being pelted with ice and popcorn from patriotic moviegoers Bush Attends Pirates World Premier in LA

 

Recently in the News