3400 Zombies March on Washington and they are mad
by Walid
Dead soliders are pissed off.(Washington : Ucs News) D.C. police and secret service agents were shocked when an undead army US troopers staggered, limped and crawled down Pennsylvania Avenue toward the White House. The angry hoard of undead threw themselves at security forces in a vain attempt to storm the White House. The unarmed zombies were quickly dismembered and removed from the scene.

According to Pentagon officials the 3400 soldiers killed Iraq were raised from the dead and reanimated with the hopes they could star in television commercials or testify in front of congress. The plan back fired when the reanimated living dead turned against their handers and began complaining about the war that cost them their lives.

With support for the war sagging to new lows The pentagon was looking forward to having an "Army of heros" to help energize support for continuing operations in Iraq. "From the beginning it all went terribly wrong." stated Richard Perle, The former assistant secretary of defense, tasked with the reanimation.

According to Perle, The undead awoke in an agitated state, many in great pain, suffering from Post Traumatic Stress and mourning the loss of their mortal souls. The mob escaped from Pentagon basement laboratory and began it's slow march to deliver revenge on the President they blame for their untimely deaths.

Speaking from inside the White House George W. Bush expressed remorse and surprise. "I understand the pain of the undead troops and their grieving families, but I think it's unfair for them to blame me for their deaths."

 
Rate This Item
 
I Liked It
 
Print
5997 Views
 
Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.
I BET YOU DIDN'T KNOW HOW SMILEYS ARE MADE!

It Really Does Make A Pretty Cool Tee Shirt, Maybe Something For Christmas 2012 End Of The World Debunked! Buy Your Christmas Presents Early

"It's my last shot, punk" J.McCain Ed-E-torial 28: "Survivor" John McCain. Mr. Sulu A Pain in Captain Kirk's Asteroid?

Club Med for Ex-Dictators Saudi Arabia to Open World's First 'Club Med' for Ex-Dictators

Republican Spin Machine Breaks Down: George W. Bush is Spitting Mad!

Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.