3400 Zombies March on Washington and they are mad
by Walid
Dead soliders are pissed off.(Washington : Ucs News) D.C. police and secret service agents were shocked when an undead army US troopers staggered, limped and crawled down Pennsylvania Avenue toward the White House. The angry hoard of undead threw themselves at security forces in a vain attempt to storm the White House. The unarmed zombies were quickly dismembered and removed from the scene.

According to Pentagon officials the 3400 soldiers killed Iraq were raised from the dead and reanimated with the hopes they could star in television commercials or testify in front of congress. The plan back fired when the reanimated living dead turned against their handers and began complaining about the war that cost them their lives.

With support for the war sagging to new lows The pentagon was looking forward to having an "Army of heros" to help energize support for continuing operations in Iraq. "From the beginning it all went terribly wrong." stated Richard Perle, The former assistant secretary of defense, tasked with the reanimation.

According to Perle, The undead awoke in an agitated state, many in great pain, suffering from Post Traumatic Stress and mourning the loss of their mortal souls. The mob escaped from Pentagon basement laboratory and began it's slow march to deliver revenge on the President they blame for their untimely deaths.

Speaking from inside the White House George W. Bush expressed remorse and surprise. "I understand the pain of the undead troops and their grieving families, but I think it's unfair for them to blame me for their deaths."

 
Rate This Item
 
I Liked It
 
Print
6106 Views
 
Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.
Astronaut Heidemarie Stefanyshyn-Piper lost her handbag in space. Astronaut Loses Handbag in Space

Plans for Bush Junior Presidential Library To Be Scaled Back.

Presidential Speech Writer Falls Asleep During Bush Iraq Address

Xbox Elite Powered Halo 2 Trooper is No Match for Warcraft Fighter. Halo 2 Trooper's Xbox 360 Elite No Match for World of War Craft Fighters as Battle for Second Life Escalates

Dick Durbin Dick Durbin Apologizes to Nazi, Soviet, and Vietcong Torturers

Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.