McCain Injury Not Serious "Accidents Happen"
by Walid
Senator John McCain treated for "Wiimote" injury(Straight Talk Express) Ucs News-- John McCain's Straight Talk express bus made an unscheduled campaign stop yesterday at the emergency room of St. Johns Region Hospital. The Arizona Senator was treated for minor injuries and released with instructions to rest for a few days. The ER doctor that treated McCain also recommended the Senator stop playing the Nintendo Wii until the protective Wii jacket is installed.

The Senator's campaign spokesman Brian Rogers told reporters that John McCain was "slightly injured" during a spirited game of Wii "Super Smash Bros Brawl". According to Rogers the Senator was playing in two player mode with his chief of staff Mark Salter when he was struck down by the "Wiimote" of Salter.

Witnesses confirmed the "Wiimote" did not have a protective Wii Remote Jacket installed and this may have increased the severity of the Senators injury.

Rogers admitted that the US Secret Service has temporary detained Salter to record a statement and complete the incident report. Rogers went on to deflect questions about the Senator's age and denied the "Wiimote" injury will not affect the campaigns schedule.

upon hearing of the incident Hillary Clinton criticized McCain for his use of an unprotected "Wiimote". Clinton stated "This just shows Senator John McCain is reckless and isn't really the national security expert he claims to be."

Clinton went on to explain that Nintendo announced a free new accessory for the Wii Remote, the Wii Remote Jacket, on October 1, 2007. The removable silicone sleeve wraps around the Wii Remote to provide users a better grip and cushioning. The cushioning intends to keep the Wii Remote protected in case it is accidentally dropped or thrown.

 
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Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.