Ben Bernanke and Henry Paulson: $20 trillion more or NorthCom will nuke a city
by Dominus Noster
Federal Reserve Chairman Ben BernankeWASHINGTON, D.C.--Ben Bernanke and Henry Paulson have announced that they are holding a stick-up of the country using NorthCom. If they don't get to print themselves $20 trillion more for bailouts, then they will use NorthCom to nuke a city or two or three.

"It is imperative that I have $20 trillion more printed up for bailouts, or else we will have NorthCom start by nuking New York. And then next comes LA, and then San Francisco, and then some other places," said Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke, who was wearing his clown disguise.

Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson echoed Bernanke, by saying that Americans will be sent to concentration camps if Congress doesn't immediately appropriate $10 trillion to bailout Goldman Sachs.Henry Paulson demands $10 trillion more for Goldman Sachs

Congressmembers, President Bush, and President-elect Barack Obama all agree that it is necessary to get $10 trillion to Goldman Sachs ASAP, or else they will support a preemptive nuclear strike against Americans.

"Consider this to be a legalized stick-up using the military, and Americans better not resist. They better lay down and play dead," said Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi.

"We will take everything every American has, and if Americans don't cooperate, they should expect to be nuked," said Congressman John Boehner.

 
Rate This Item
 
I Liked It
 
Print
5537 Views
 
Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.
Fashion World Bands Together To Support Kate Moss

The Donald To The Brits...um...Side? Ed-E-torial 22: Paris Hilton says, "No more Greeks." Britney Spears Gets Donald Trump's Hair.

$365 Million Powerball Winner Steps Forward!

Family Research Council : The Friendly Hate Group! Family Research Council joins with KKK in Anti Gay rally

CLINTON AND OBAMA COMMITTING POLITICAL SUICIDE

Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.