UCS Reporters
The Dood Abides
Dominus Noster
Ed E. Druckman
Kamal El-Din
Gunther Schnitzel
Chuck Terzella
Walid
Nickfun

 

 

 
$1,000,000 reward offered for capturing Sharron Angle
 
by Dominus Noster
 
LAS VEGAS - The DoJ has offered a $1,000,000 reward for information leading to the capture of the wild Nevadan dingbat Sharron Angle. She is suspected of having ties to rogue, terrorist elements within the United States.

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God Says, "Don't Build The 'Ground Zero Mosque'...No, Wait A Minute..."
 
by Chuck Terzella
 
Sorry...I tried to upload a picture of God, but it wouldn't work so I picked the cutest one I had in my files and anyway, who's to say that this isn't what God looks like?

First of all, this is about what the conservative pundits are calling the "Ground Zero Mosque", although it's not at Ground Zero. Second of all, I'm not a New Yorker- I'm an ex-New Yorker. I haven't lived in Manhattan since 1989 and the last time I worked there was like, 1998 or something and I've only been back once since 9/11. But since people who've never come within a thousand miles of the City seem to have no problem weighing in on what should be a local problem, then I guess I have a right to as well. And that opinion is: everybody, both pro-mosque and anti-mosque, are completely wrong and mostly a bunch of idiots.

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City Water for Port Hueneme, CA Now More Expensive Than Bottled Water
 
by NickFun
 
Por Hueneme Mayor Jonathan Sharkey claims the city tap water is well worth the $1.59 per gallon price.
After its third rate hike in one year, the city of Port Hueneme (Pro: Why-knee-me) , CA has now raised its rates for city tap water so high that it is now more expensive than many bottled drinking waters.

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Pop Star Justin Bieber Plans Comeback World Tour for 2035
 
by NickFun
 
Mature pop star Justin Bieber knows his youth and good fortune won't last forever
16 year pop Canadian singing sensation Justin Bieber announced today that he plans on making a 'comeback' world tour in 2035 when he is 41 years old.

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Highway to the Danger Zone

Washington How to Overthrow The U.S. Government In 5 Easy Steps

Ghana: A new threat to our freedom? Ghana Beats USA : Marines storm their capital

I'm proud of what Republicians have done. John McCain Lists Top Ten Bush Administration Accomplishments:

Gangs rejoice - Citizens flee Hand Gun band Lifted : Washington D.C. Criminals Rejoice!

 

Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.

 

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