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National News

White House Scorecard: Page Two

September 30, 2005 Staff

The Republican Administration of George W. Bush has released “Scorecard- Page Two”. The Scorecard Concept, which is an effort by the White House to help members of the Republican Party be better able to determine [Read more]

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National News

Jailing Texas Politicians Would Cut Crime Rate

September 30, 2005 Staff

Washington/Yellowcake- Congressional Republicans have responded with anger to the comments of former Assistant to the Associate Director for Developments in the Education Department under the Carter Administration and talk show host Elmo Lamont Hassenfeiger that [Read more]

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National News

Shocked Unconfirmed Sources Editor Kamal El-Din Admits: "It's All Lies!"

September 30, 2005 Staff

Unconfirmed Sources Editors are reportedly said to be shocked to find out that none of the stories veteran writer Chuck Terzella has posted on the prestigious news site were true. In the wake of the [Read more]

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National News

Bush Makes Surprise Justice Appointment

September 30, 2005 Staff

Washington, DC (APE) – In a stunning move today, President Bush in a “snap appointment” and swearing in ceremony bypassed congressional authorities and filled the justice position formerly held by Sandra Day O’Connor. The position [Read more]

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National News

Bill Frist, Tom DeLay and Treasonous Behaviors: White House Issues New Scorecard System

September 30, 2005 Staff

As a service to the nation, the White House will begin issue weekly reports and updates that will provide confused Republicans with a running scorecard of current indictments and ongoing investigations of various Party leaders [Read more]

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National News

Tom Delay Arrest Photos go up for Sale

September 29, 2005 Staff

Washington (Claw News Service) – Lawyers for Tom Delay scrambled yesterday in negotiations with Texas authorities in an attempt to have Mr. Delay avoid the indignity of public arrest and handcuffing. Mr. Delay has been [Read more]

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Celebrity News

Tom Cruise Forced to Cancel Psychiatry Lecture

September 28, 2005 Staff

HOLLYWOOD – Although Mission Impossible III star Tom Cruise angrily denies that he was scheduled to deliver a secret lecture on the evils of psychiatry to a class of new recruits at Hollywood’s Church of [Read more]

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National News

Britney Spears To Hold Protest For Tom DeLay

September 28, 2005 Staff

(Los Angeles-CA) She’s a Dixie chick behind a Republican. Britney Spears announced today that she would travel to Crawford, Texas and maintain a vigil in front of President Bush’s ranch until a Texas grand jury [Read more]