Tobacco PSA (Wilmington–DE) At a joint press conference today, pharmaceutical giant Merck and tobacco tower Philip Morris announced that they will merge. The union became destined when both companies realized that “our products kill people,” [Read more]
Washington, DC (Rotters) – The planned release of a 700 tonne explosive cross-dressing male prostitute within the Pentagon has been postponed because of legal, moral, and ethical concerns said an anonymous Pentagon agency spokesperson. The [Read more]
(UCS NEWS, Washington D.C.) Opps! another leak reported from inside the Bush White House. This time a memo dated May 15th was mistakenly passed to the Withe House press core for distribution. The memo details [Read more]
Santa Monica, CA (APE) – President Bush yesterday delivered his traditional commencement address to graduates form the West Point military academy. During the address, he framed the war on terror as the next cold war, [Read more]
(USC News :South of the Manson Nixon line) Three years after the dreaded comment, the Dixie Chicks are still being ignored by country radio stations. But the subject of their remarks admits they were right [Read more]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a bold move by the White House, President George W. Bush has promised to impose a new rule on Republican Party lobbyists. White House Press Secretary Tony Snow said that this [Read more]
Washington, DC (APE) – Scarcely minutes after a nationally televised meeting at the White House between British Prime Minister Tony Blair and President Bush was completed, White House sources stated that Mr. Blair asked for [Read more]
Toke, Toke, Toke That Cigarette: Researchers at UCLA’s David Geffen School of Medicine have found that even heavy use of marijuana does not increase your risk of getting lung, mouth, neck, throat or esophageal cancer. [Read more]
Oswego, NY (Rotters) – Right Wing NeoCon pundit Ann Coulter was very nearly killed by her own hair last night to the shock and amazement of an auditorium filled with admirers at a small private [Read more]
May 24, 2006 In an unexpected yet welcome announcement from the White House Rose Garden, United States President George W. Bush has made public plans for removing American troops from Iraq. Explaining that the United [Read more]
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