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National News

Coming This November to a Touchscreen Near You : D2

August 31, 2006 Staff

“HE CAN’T BE BARGAINED WITH, HE CAN’T BE REASONED WITH, AND HE ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT STOP UNTIL WE’RE ALL DEAD.” Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire [Read more]

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National News

White House Reveals "Flat Leader" Program

August 31, 2006 Staff

Washington, DC (APE) – Taking a cue from the Maine National Guard’s successful “Flat Daddy” program, the White House today revealed its successful ongoing “Flat Leader” program. In a time of war, when resources and [Read more]

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Ed-E-torial

Ed-E-torial #3: Britney Spears Says, "No Anal." Jenna Jameson Gets Searched. And Barry Bonds Auth…

August 31, 2006 Staff

Ed-E-torial #3: Britney Says, “No anal.” Jenna Jameson Gives Good Google. Click here for more! (New York–NY) Welcome Dear Friends and Respected Enemies and, yes, you too George Bush. It’s Ed-E-torial #3. Or as we [Read more]

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National News

Bush Kneed in Groin on First Anniversary of Katrina Disaster

August 29, 2006 Staff

New Orleans, LA (Rotters) – President Bush was briefly assaulted today by a hurricane Katrina survivor at a photo opportunity outside of an eating establishment in New Orleans. The president was described as dazed and [Read more]

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National News

Taxing Native American Sellers…As Usual, Whites Want A Piece Of The Action.

August 29, 2006 Staff

I don’t usually address local or statewide issues on this site, but indulge me if you will for a moment. I live, as I’ve said many times before in Syracuse, New York. I am also, [Read more]

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The President

Bush Travels to Alaska to Survey Katrina Recovery Efforts

August 28, 2006 Staff

The President has started a two day tour of Katrina recovery efforts starting with a fly by of the Gulf Coast and stops in Fairbanks and Juneau Alaska. With mid-term elections on the horizon the [Read more]

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National News

Experimental Plan D Released as Over the Counter by Mistake

August 27, 2006 Staff

New York, NY (APE) – An embarrassed Barred Pharmaceuticals President Fred Wilkinson, today announced that its experimental male contraceptive pill, Plan D, was released nationwide, mistakenly upon the rollout of its over-the-counter controversial morning after [Read more]

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National News

In The Wake Of British Airline Plot, Homeland Security Dept. Issues New Terror Alert List

August 27, 2006 Staff

The White House and The Department of Homeland Security, just in time for the mid term elections, has issued a New Terror Warning based on instances of “increased chatter”. This warning comes on the heels [Read more]

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National News

Increasingly, Americans Demand Bush Give A Timetable For Withdrawal.

August 27, 2006 Staff

More and more Americans…Democrat, Republican, Independent or otherwise…dissatisfied with United States President George W. Bush’s performance and handling of nearly every issue from the Iraq War to stem cell research and no longer content to [Read more]

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National News

Texas Air National Guard Recalls George W. Bush To Active Duty: White House Says He's Missing.

August 25, 2006 Staff

(Another Boring Summer Re-Run…No, wait…) The Texas Air National Guard, facing the same enlistment woes as every other branch of the military, has taken the extraordinary step of recalling President George W. Bush back to [Read more]