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Debt Ceiling Plan Not Approved; Banks Foreclose on US

July 30, 2011 Staff

The entire United States Government was foreclosed on by major banking institutions today and the entire government will be auctioned off to foreign investors. “We did everything we could”, said Republican House Speaker John Boehner. [Read more]

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John Boehner and Eric Cantor Rushed to Hospital After Late Night Car Wreck

July 29, 2011 Staff

Unconfirmed sources report that Republican leaders John Boehner and Eric Cantor are in stable condition this morning after a late night auto accident. The accident occurred when the vehicle, a classic convertible driven by Cantor, [Read more]

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Casey Anthony Fights For Murderers Rights

July 28, 2011 Staff

Newly released Casey Anthony says she is being denied housing, transportation, denied service at restaurants and claims other forms of discrimination just because she is a murderer. “Murderers are the only people being legally discriminated [Read more]

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Saudi Arabia to Open World's First 'Club Med' for Ex-Dictators

July 27, 2011 Staff

JEDDAH – The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia has announced an ambitious plan to construct the world’s first luxury resort town for former tyrants. The Red Sea Retirement Retreat has already been dubbed a ‘Club Med [Read more]

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Saudi Arabia to Open World's First 'Club Med' for Ex-Dictators

July 27, 2011 Staff

JEDDAH – The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia has announced an ambitious plan to construct the world’s first luxury resort town for former tyrants. The Red Sea Retirement Retreat has already been dubbed a ‘Club Med [Read more]

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Goldman Sachs Shares Surge On Announcement of Bitcoin Trading Unit

July 27, 2011 Staff

Unconfirmed sources are reporting that shares of Wall Street giant Goldman Sachs are rallying after a late announcement that they are launching a Bitcoin trading unit. The new virtual currency trading unit will actually work [Read more]

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Moody's Downgrades GOP to Junk Status

July 27, 2011 Staff

Unconfirmed sources report that Moody’s, the beleaguered bond rating agency, has downgraded the Republican Party to ‘junk’. The down downgrade comes amidst tense negations between polarized members of the caucus which has paralyzed the party’s [Read more]

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Federal Government Creates GOD To Watch Citizens

July 23, 2011 Staff

The US Government has secretly created a new watchdog agency to monitor the activities of each and every American via cell phones, computers and surveillance cameras for 24 hours each day, 365 or 366 days [Read more]

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Space Shuttle Trader Magazine Folds as NASA Ends Shuttle Program

July 22, 2011 Staff

Unconfirmed sources report that Shuttle Trader Magazine, the premiere used Space Shuttle sales publication, will close after its next issue. Things looked bleak for Shuttle Trader after NASA announced it would give the Shuttles away, [Read more]

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Eric Cantor Hospitalized After Hitting Debt Ceiling

July 22, 2011 Staff

Unconfirmed sources are reporting that House Republican Eric Cantor has been hospitalized with minor head injuries after an accident in the Capitol Building last night. Cantor was apparently returning to his office after a late [Read more]