Barack Obama And The Chamber Of Commerce Butt Heads On Hidden PAC Contributions.

(Today is 10/11/10, which while not as great as 10/10/10, is still pretty binary.)

All politics is local…except when it comes to who’s paying for it. Then it becomes a national or now, even an international exercise. But I’m happy to now see that shadowy foreign governments and corporations are finally investing in America, albeit in the form of paying American actors and ad companies to do political spots, giving jobs to workers in the Political Action Committees- PACs (hey, those guys have kids to feed too.) and putting untraceable cash directly into our elected representative’s pockets so they don’t have to burden our budget process with pesky pay raises. They still will, but at least they don’t have to. All of these things are good for our economy. Sure, it may be terrible for our society, but when fire departments let people’s animals burn to death over a $75.00 fee, you know our society is shot to pieces anyway, so that’s a non-issue.

But let’s put our society and South Fulton, Tennessee’s version of compassion and animal welfare aside-and I like to believe that that episode was just an illustration Voltaire’s comment about Admiral Byng, “…in this country it is useful to kill an Admiral now and then, just to encourage the rest.”. Plus, it gave Glenn (The Constitution Is Hanging By A Thread!) Beck, that devout Mormon evangelist, a couple days of good clean fun on his show mocking the family whose animals burned to death, so that’s nice too. But I guess we should still examine the issue…the issue of hidden campaign contributions by shadowy foreign governments and corporations, not South Fulton’s burning animals to death or Glenn Beck’s thinking it was funny. We’ve covered that. People, please keep up.

President Obama has raised the question in campaign speeches recently, asking whether it’s a good thing or not that shadowy foreign governments and corporations can now contribute buckets of cash to our politicians without any public accountability (Actually, I think he said it wasn’t a good thing). Well, Mr. President, Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas thought it was a good idea and since his wife actually solicits those donations from those shadowy foreign governments and corporations on behalf of Conservative PACs, he’s in a position to know about the issue intimately and if you can’t trust Clarence Thomas, who can you trust?

(I said yesterday that politics is a numbers game- whoever has the biggest number after the dollar sign usually wins. I actually have nothing to add to that, but I thought it was a really good line and just wanted to use it again. Thanks.)

Anyway, it’s not just Mrs. Thomas’ little boy Clarence who thinks it’s okay; the American Chamber of Commerce thinks it’s great idea too and it’s hard to think of a more Liberal group than that, at least in Conservative politics. (Ah, that’s wrong- it’s really easy to think of more Liberal groups, even in Conservative politics, but I’ve already written it and it’s staying. I can’t waste all day on this crap.) Actually, they think it’s such a great idea that they’re denying it happens at all, pointing to the fact that they’ve proved it doesn’t by not opening up their books because it’s legal for shadowy foreign governments and corporations to not contribute buckets of cash to our politicians without any public accountability too. Hah! So there.

So it boils down to this: during his campaign, President Obama bemoaned the decline of America’s standing in the world, accusing George Bush, Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld’s ‘go it alone’ style for that decline. But now, when foreign countries like China, Saudi Arabia and Micronesia are finally taking an interest in America and contributing millions of dollars to the GOP (A caveat- I don’t know if these three countries in particular are finally taking an interest in America and contributing to the GOP, because that’s the point: Freedom of Speech should be hidden. That’s the law. I mean, you all say anything you want on the web and don’t use your real names. This is the same thing, but just with shadowy foreign governments and corporations and millions of dollars. Just because you don’t have millions of dollars or have a shadowy foreign government or corporation to buy your own politician with is your own damn fault.), President Obama suddenly flip-flops on the issue and is demanding accountability. Jeez. Some people.

Oh, and don’t forget to vote (Democratic) come November.

*I’ve decided that one day I’m gonna write a piece that uses every one of the punctuation, diacritical and numeric marks on my keyboard. If you don’t like it go # sand.

(Editor’s Note: No, he won’t. Trust us on this one.)
(Author’s Note: Bastards.)
(Editor’s Note: Yeah, yeah…try writing a funny article sometime.)
(Editor’s Note: Uh…)