Unconfirmed sources report that the nation’s business leaders have agree to lease the Executive Branch of the government of the United States for another four years. The lease was signed at the White House today as the first order of business of George Bush’s second term. The details of the new lease have not been disclosed but insiders report a steep increase from last terms price as the Bush regime now has a proven track of delivering legislation and freebies for corporate America.
“The current administration has shown they can deliver complete control of the government to the lease holders, making the lease very valuable.” Says economic expert Paul Krugman. “During the first Bush term close co-operation in the policy and budget areas made for a good working relationship between business and the Bush Administration. Business leaders really know what they are getting this time around and were willing to spend big money to secure the rights the US Government. Corporate America has some big plans for the second Bush term and signing this lease deal early will make a big difference. I expect to see a lot of action this term as each business interest gets there pet project rolling.”
“The Bush administration has been the best government that money can buy. These guys have really given us the keys to the castle.” Admitted Ellen Alemany President & Chief Executive Officer of CitiCapital, part of the CitiGroup financial empire. “This is an especially important lease period for us we are hoping to privatize Social Security and make a bundle of money managing private investment accounts. With the Executive Branch and Congress under our control we are going to make a big pile of money.”
Other business leaders agree. “We knew they were going to jack up the price on us this time, but we know it will be worth it.” Said David Lesar, CEO of the oil industry giant Haliburton. “We have got some serious asbestos liabilities to get rid of so were very glad to pitch in on the lease. With just a little bit more money thrown at the Congress we will get a law passed to absolve us from an responsibilities is the whole asbestos mess. This new lease is a real godsend for us.”
“I can’t say how relieved I am that we go the new lease signed with the Bush administration.” Said Northwest Airlines President and CEO Douglas Steenland. “We are going to shed all of our pension obligations during this next term and without the new lease it would have been very messy and very costly. But now that we are running the government we will pass a law and make the tax payers bail out the airline industry again. It’s an expensive lease, to be sure, but it ends up being a small price to pay to have complete control over two of the three branches of the US Government.”
After President Bush and a representative from the Fortune 100 signed the lease they shook hands and left to start an evening packed with big money winning and dinning. It was smiles all around as both sides are looking forward to continuing a very profitable relationship.