London, England (UPSI) – British Prime Minister Tony Blair mysteriously vanished early this morning just hours before a scheduled official announcement In regards to the withdrawal of 3000 British troops from Iraq by year’s end. Information is sketchy at this point but it appears that Blair’s entire security contingent at Downing Street became mysteriously ill, facilitating a possible Early-morning kidnapping of the Prime Minister. MI-5 authorities are refusing to comment on an unfolding embarrassing situation, but speculations abounded that Mr. Blair was either kidnapped in a terrorist plot or subjected to extreme rendition at the hands of American CIA undercover operatives.
A picture surfaced from an anonymous source presumably taken early this morning which shows Blair apparently being spirited out of his quarters by an unidentified contingent of armed men. A check of flight logs at a small private airstrip outside of London’s Heathrow Airport revealed that there indeed had been a documented early morning arrival and departure of a private jet leased to Blackwater security, a North Carolina-based firm.
A spokesperson for the White House vehemently denied any CIA involvement in Blair’s disappearance, insisting that, in all likelihood, the prime minister was a victim of the rampant Muslim extremism which appears to have infiltrated British society, and appears to have begun clouding its collective judgment. “Our sympathies go out to the Prime Minister’s wife and family and the country of Great Britain,” stated the spokesperson. “We will devote all the resources of America’s vast intelligence community in order to render justice in Mr. Blair’s case. This should serve as a reminder to everyone that the war on terror is indeed a deadly game in which we are all involved. At this time, we won’t comment further, but preliminary information indicates that there may be a possibility of Iranian involvement.”