Bob Woodward sucked into Plame-Gate Black Hole

Unconfirmed sources report the veteran Washington D.C. reporter has crossed the event horizon of the Plame investigation. As reported November 14th, Bob Woodward of the Washington Post, entered the air space around the Plame-Gate Black Hole and is now being inescapably drawn toward the center of the dark mass. He could not be reached for comment. Woodward is not alone in his fate as many others including Judy Miller, Scooter Libby, Robert Novak and Matt Copper have fallen into the gravity well surrounding the Plame investigation black hole.

Astronomers have been carefully watching the growth of this super massive black hole since its appearance in late 2003. Scientists first noticed the strange behavior of the object in March of 2004 when it began pulling in members of the press and high ranking officials of the Bush Administration. With NASA’s new Spitzer Space Telescope, scientists have detected the flow of Republican matter as it is drawn into the core of the super massive Plame Black Hole.

Rob Gutermuth of the Harvard-Smithsonian Center for Astrophysics, observed “This is a massively dense object, the weight of its gravity is well beyond what we can measure. Anything drawn into the Plame will be pulled apart them smashed down into a near singular state of matter.” There has been great speculation about what exists at the center of this dark object. Special Counsel Patrick Fitzgerald has been called to the Spitzer Space Telescope to review the images of the Plame. When asked, Fitzgerald only said the center of the dark matter looks a bit like “Official A”.

Both friends and foes of Woodwards’ reporting admit the whole event sounds painful and embarrassing for all those involved. Long time associate Carl Bernstein stated, “It’s tough to watch a respected reporter like Woodward get sucked in and imploded, but then again that is the current price of White House access.