Boy George Bets No Delay Case

Washington, DC (O! Online) – Boy George just got a big bag of Christmas switches from a Texas judge. The “Political Capital” President’s prediction that the money laundering case against Republican fundraiser and former House majority leader Tom Delay would be resolved quickly with Mr. Delay’s innocence has just been extended well into the new year.

The extension ironically, came at the request of the defense, who was seeking to have charges against Mr. Delay dropped. Boy George is currently outside of his native Crawford, Texas, working on excuses and alibis, per his lawyer.

The year 59-year-old former Yale cheerleader, whose real name is George W. Bush, was busted last week, when he admitted to the nation that he had been illegally wiretapping American citizens for almost 3 years.

When the Capitol Hill police arrived, they found multiple video links to the bedrooms of prominent Democratic leaders on his computer, and he was placed under White House arrest. It is speculated that he will be later charged with treason and criminal transgression of constitutional amendments to the nth degree.

Boy George has maintained his innocence throughout the matter, claiming that the video feeds were his right as president at time of war.

His attorney, Harriet Myers, blames the bust on political posturing over her client’s busy and patriotic lifestyle. She told the Washington Post in October that Boy George, “Had a lot of people under surveillance at the White House. People who have nothing to hide don’t object to wiretapping.”

The president has also battled drug abuse in the past. He had experimented with cocaine and marijuana in the 1970s and 80s and was convicted of a DWI in the 70s. He claims to have kicked the habit through Evangelical Christianity and spoke elusively about it during his campaign in 2000.

The Delay decision opens the possibility for more plea bargains from witnesses in both this case and the pending Abramoff scandal which may implicate half of the Republicans in Washington.

If pursued in earnest, Boy George should certainly face impeachment at a minimum, and at a maximum, many years in prison.