Britney Spears Arrested For Houston Courthouse Tom DeLay Protest

(Houston–TX) Britney Spears was arrested yesterday for indecent exposure when she publicly bore her breasts in support of former House Majority Leader Tom DeLay in front of the Houston courthouse where he is to be tried on money laundering charges. The Pop Mom held up a sign that read: “Two good reasons to free Tom”, also arrested were her son, whom she recently renamed Tom DeLay Sean Preston Spears, and husband Kevin Federline, who did not bare his breasts.

Both Spears and Federline were vocal at an impromptu staged press conference they held outside of the Houston Police Department from which Spears was released. “First,” said Spears, “they arrest me for exercising my Constitutional right of free speech by baring my breasts. Then, they call them indecent. You’ve seen them. Are they indecent? And remember, I just had a kid.” At this point, the press corp. broke into spontaneous applause. “And they’re f*ckin’ real,” added Federline, “not like these charges against Tom!”

Spears had been holding a two-week vigil at President Bush’s ranch in Crawford, Texas, vowing not to leave until Bush met with her on the charges against DeLay. A reporter again asked why she was maintaining a vigil in Crawford when the President hadn’t been at the ranch for months. Spears answered: “Well I’m not there now. I’m here. Okay.”

Spears held up Tom DeLay Sean Preston, whom she had dressed in an infant sized Houston County Jail Orange jumpsuit by BabyGap. “Take a look. This is what Ronnie Earle is doing to a man who is as innocent as my son.” Tom DeLay Sean Preston then spit-up on a reporter. “These charges make even him sick to his stomach.”

Spears vowed that she would continue her protest, baring whatever “smokin’ hot body part I see fit until this man is again free to get people voting as often as they like.” Federline added: “I see us as John and Yoko for the new century, fighting for what’s right.” Spears then turned to him: “That would make you Yoko, Honey.” Federline answered: “I’m really not cool with that because I have a better singing voice.” He then turned around, dropped his Pepe jeans and yelled: “Ronnie Earle pucker up.”

Federline was arrested.

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