Bush Laptop Federal Budget Crashes Windows Vista

Washington, DC (APE) – The long heralded final Bush Federal Budget for the fiscal year 2009 ended in a sour note today at the White House, as the budget itself appeared to crash Microsoft’s most stable operating system to date, Windows Vista. The president was attempting to Institute a cost saving measure by not printing out the budget as has been traditionally done, presenting the budget in electronic form on a laptop, when it suddenly reverted to the “blue screen of death” familiar to Windows users.

“We had cautioned the White House against attempting this,” stated a Microsoft technical support spokesperson. “Vista is designed to be comfortable with all manner of mathematics from science and engineering to economics, but we have had real trouble with programming Windows to run on the patented “fuzzy math” that is a staple for the Bush administration. We spend millions in time and resources attempting to plug memory holes in our software and yet this is the very concept that “fuzzy math” is based on. Needless to say, it is a challenge to come up with a reliably unstable operating system to run their numbers with.”

Undaunted, the White House claimed that it was relatively certain that Microsoft technical support would be able to straighten out what it described as minor technical glitches with the software, allowing anyone online to have a look at their record $3.1 trillion budget. “For anyone that insists upon a print copy, these can be ordered online for $200 each,” stated White House press secretary Dana Perino. “We will also be selling copies of our new instruction manual for the software version called “The Federal Budget for Smart People”. It will be available online and through all major bookstores for $29.95. Proceeds will go to the Hillary Clinton Campaign.”

A budget version for Apple OSX will not be made available due to the unanticipated stability of the operating system, the White House stated.