Unconfirmed sources report that the President has fired head of the Department of the Interior, Secretary Gale A. Norton, and replaced her with White House Janitor Henry Rodriguez. The President announced the cabinet change at a press conference early this morning and introduced Rodriguez to the country.
“The country needed to see change at the Department of the Interior and the President went looking for a dynamic trusted member of his inner circle to take control.” said White House spokesmen Ben Lion. “Rodriguez is a trusted member of the Bush team whom the President knows can clean up any mess he is faced with. I myself can attested to Henry’s qualifications when it comes to these matters.”
“Henry Rodriguez is my choice to run Department of the Interior, and I know he can to the job. Henry is uniquely qualified to head the Department of the Interior, which will put him in charge of the currently rudderless Environmental Protection Agency.” explained the President at his early morning press conference. “Henry has worked for me for years, and I know he can do a great job cleaning up the country. Henry has done a heck of a job cleaning up after me and the girls, hell even Laura thinks he is a good a janitor. Now he is the whole country’s janitor.”
The President dismissed charges that Rodriguez was just another crony of his getting a payoff for years of service to the Bush family. And made the case that the country needed more people working at job they know nothing about so that a fresh perspective can be applied to solving the problems that face the country.
Senate Republicans are already lining up support the President’s choice.
“If the President wants Henry to run the Department of the Interior then who are we to say no.” said Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist. Rodriguez is expected to be approved by a voice vote tomorrow and should take control of the Department of the Interior by early next week.