Bush To Cindy Sheehan: "I know how Cindy Sheehan feels. I'm a mother too."

(Crawford–TX) “I know how Cindy Sheehan feels. I’m a mother too,” the line attributed to George Bush in the latest Drudge Report has many Republicans spinning faster than plates on sticks at the circus.

The quote was allegedly overheard by “manure scooper”, Jorge Cavallo, whose self-described duty at the Crawford ranch is to “walk behind the President and scoop up the crap so the smell doesn’t distract the President and dignitaries when they are horseback riding and talking about important world matters.” Cavallo added that it’s also necessary “because Mrs. Bush doesn’t want the Secret Service agents who follow behind the horse’s asses to step in it and track it into the kitchen.”

Three days into Sheehan’s vigil to meet with the President over the death of her son, Casey, in Iraq, Cavallo alleges that Bush was riding with newly elect King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia. The two were talking about hummus and the subject of Sheehan came up. Bush seemed genuinely moved by her vigil and wanted to send her out “some Ben & Jerry’s, Cherry Garcia.” Then Cavallo claims that Bush said, “I don’t understand why the Singing Nun (That’s his pet name for Mrs. Sheehan.) is so mad at me. I know how Cindy Sheehan feels. I’m a mother too.” Cavallo went on to say that even though Bush was “laughing, it must have been to hide his sorrow, because tears were coming out of his eyes.”

White House Press Secretary Scott McCellan, power drinking from a bottle of Pepto-Bismol, said this at a press conference hours ago: “The President values Jorge Cavallo as an employee and an equal, speaking to him in Spanglish on many occasions. However, we believe that Senor Cavallo could not have heard this on the day in question, since the horses were constipated due to an excess rice to corn ratio in their feed mixture. For that reason, Senor Cavallo was removed from manure logistics for that entire week.” A follow-up question was then asked. It seems that a waiter, Garth Zahn, later that night heard the President make the same statement at a barbecue fundraiser for Tom DeLay. Secretary McClellan took a deep drink from his bottle of antacid and replied: “Oh