Cheney to Face Manslaughter Charges : Harry Whittington Dead

(Texas:UCS News) Vice President Dick Cheney has been notified by the Texas Attorney General not to leave the country. Cheney will face charges related to the shooting death of Harry Whittington . Cheney was hunting quail at a friend’s South Texas ranch when he shot and wounded Harry Whittington, a 78-year-old attorney from Austin and Bush-Cheney campaign contributor. After several days in intensive care Whittinton succumbed to his injuries.

The shooting was originally classified as accidental until a blood alcohol test of Cheney relieved the Vice President was legally intoxicated. John O’Neil who also hunting with the Vice President claimed he had seen Dick Cheney drinking heavily the entire day. “Dick was hammered, he could barely walk much-less see or shoot straight.”

According to O’Neil “The unarmed Whittington was holding a whiskey bottle as a target for the vice president, Cheney was holding the rifle and trying to urinate while shooting the bottle.” Sheriff’s deputies in Kenedy County report, Cheney missed the bottle and pissed on his own boots. The wounded Whittington was rushed to the hospital in the Vice President’s personal ambulance which is always on standby.

Once in Corpus Christi, Whittington was admitted to intensive care where doctors removed the bird shot from is head, neck and chest. “The patient was in serious but stabile condition.” according to hospital spokesmen. But the doctors failed to operate on his toe that was cut by the broken whisky bottle. It was complications related to this wound that would later cause the death of Harry Whittington.

White House spokesman Scott McClellan said the news was released in a timely fashion But Cheney’s office did not acknowledge the shooting to the public until Sunday afternoon. “This way we beat the news cycle, the story did not hit the Sunday papers or the Sunday talk shows.”

All involved are happy to know the Bush Administration can stay focused on what is truly important.