Clinton Picks Ann Coulter As Her VP

WASHINGTON – (1 Apr.) Interviewed this morning on TV’s TODAY SHOW, Presidential Candidate Hillary Clinton revealed to a stunned audience, her choice for a running mate in her determined drive toward the Presidency.

” I have asked Ann Coulter to accept the Vice Presidency, should I become the President, and she has graciously accepted,” said Clinton. ” The odds against my beating Obama were getting long. Now I can be assured of not only my following, but the votes of the idiots who approve of that right-wing, anti establishment, dirty mouth, liberal-baiting bitch. I know there will be those whose vote I will lose due to this decision, but it will swing all those religious nuts, right wingers and skinhead redneck votes my way. She explained.
Ann Coulter responded to the appointment by saying that she was flattered and will certainly urge all her homophobic, hatemongering following to switch their votes from McCain (“Whom I hate!”) to Clinton.

“Why can’t we all get along!”