WASHINGTON, DC – Despite a strong protest from Vice President, Dick Cheney, the former East German company, Vallbilter Werks GmbH (VWG), was awarded a $342 million contract to build a copy of the Berlin wall along the Mexican/USA border.
President Bush, in awarding the contract, said, “Vall … Vall … Vall … something built the Berlin wall when Germany was divided into East and West to keep the Commies out. The wall they build along our southern border will keep those Mexican wetbacks from coming here to take the good fruit-pickin’ jobs from hard working Americans.”
“We are considering hiring some of the old East German guards,” he added, “to train our Border Patrol how to eliminate Mexican terrorists who climb the electric fence, escape the minefield and machine guns, and avoid the killer dogs.”
The Vice President, in a rare disagreement with his superior, was against the move.
“I can’t understand why Halliburton was not awarded the contract,” he complained. “After all, they have been awarded every other federal contract in Iraq, Afghanistan, Yugoslavia and Katrina!”
When he heard about the proposed wall, Mexican President, Felipe Calderon, responded forcefully.
“We are negotiating with a U.S. company, Halliburton,” he said, “to build our own wall along our northern border to keep those damn gringos out.”
Some Mississippi Congressmen complained that they needed the Mexicans to pick subsidized cotton on their plantations. “They work for a buck an hour,” said one Congressman. “Now we’ll have to pay the local blacks minimum wage.”