Dick Cheney "I just want to be loved"

Unconfirmed Sources reports Vice President Dick Cheney has a softer, even tender side to his gruff, tough talking pubic persona. Speaking to a crowd gathered for the Pentagons’ 911 ceremony , the Vice President revealed his new strategy to win the war on terror. “I think if we can just bomb a few more cities and kill a few more moslems, they will finally love us.”

Vice President Cheney detailed the new plan he calls “Kill for Love”. According to Cheney, the Kill for Love plan was devised with the help of The Secretary of Defense, Donald Rumsfeld. Together, Rumsfeld and Cheney are launching the new peace offensive globally in a last ditch attempt to win and end the war on terror.

The Pentagon has reported that over 137 towns, villages and cities have been damaged or destroyed in the US war or terror. The new plan calls for another 75 to 80 middle eastern towns to be leveled in Iraq, Lebanon, Afghanistan and France.

While the war on terror has directly killed a minimum of 62,006 people, the Cheney “Kill to Love” strategy calls for at-least double that amount to be lost over the next 7 years. While not mentioned in the new strategy, experts agree that as a side effect, we could see triple the 4.5 million refugees already created by the widening conflict.

Vice President Cheney is confident that “given enough bloodshed, the people of the world will love America again.” Given the full backing of the Bush administration and the Republican controlled congress, very little stands in the way of Cheney’s strategy. In the closing words of his Pentagon 911 speech Cheney called on voices of the past to endorse his new vision of peace. “I believe It was Jesus Christ or Ghandi that said, ‘Kill them all and let god sort them out.”