Ed-E-torial #12: George Clooney Still Sexy. Tom Cruise Still Short. Britney Still Commando.

(New York–NY) Welcome Dear Friends and Respected Enemies and, yes, you too George Bush. It’s Ed-E-torial #12. Or as we like to call it: “The one where we introduce you to Michael “What the Buck” Buckley.”

(London-England) Sir Elton John made his views clear on religion during a recent interview with The London Observer. “I think religion has always tried to turn hatred toward gay people. The problem is there are so many gay people I know who love their religion, and some of them aren’t even priests.”

(Los Angeles-CA) For the second time, People magazine named George Clooney “The Sexiest Man Alive”. Clooney shares that double honor with his friend Brad Pitt and Richard Gere. Tom Cruise, who was voted by People the man alive most likely to embarrass himself in public by overly demonstrative shows of affection for a, perhaps, staged marriage, had no comment on his honor.

(Princeton-NJ) The College Board, keeper of the SAT, said the high school senior class of 2006 had the lowest overall score in 31 years. But the College Board maintains this is nothing to worry about since it was the first year exam where takers had to contend with an essay section. The College Board further went on to say that while SAT scores were the lowest they have been in 31 years, students who locked themselves in the bathroom because their test scores weren’t quite good enough to get the into an Ivy league school was 5% lower than 2005. Go team.

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