Farmville Man Can't Handle YoVille


39 year old Sean Jackson spent several years using the Facebook application Farmville and, having accumulated over 1.1 million Farmville dollars, finally decided to use his wealth on YoVille, only to find he was not up to the city life and now seeks to return to the farm.

“I gave it all up”, Jackson said remorsefully. “I had a successful farm, a villa, a manor, a carousel, a big hot air balloon and crops that never failed. I gave it all up for YoVille”.

Jackson claims the YoVille lifestyle got him addicted to cheap sex, drugs and alcohol. A far cry from the humble farmer he once was.

“YoVille was just too stressful”, Jackson continued. “I was always in and out of the sack with cheap whores. The cops were all over the place. I couldn’t sleep for the noise. Now I’m trying to clean up and get back to the farm.”

Like many Zynga addicts, Jackson has a hard time distinguishing the fantasy worlds of Farmville and YoVille from reality. However, he clams either application is far better than his ‘real life’ world where he works as an accountant.

“I just wish I hadn’t sold all my Farmville stuff”, Jackson lamented. “I still have a couple million Farmville dollars and I should have the farm back on its feet in no time!”

Though Jackson says he will never stray from his farm again, he does say he has been spending some time in Petville.

“The dog never pees on the rug and I don’t have to train him”, Jackson said.