First Lady and Barney Sign on With Senate Republicans Seeking to Stop Troop Escalation

Washington, DC (APE) – First Lady Laura Bush and first dogs Barney and Miss Beazley today signed on with a bipartisan Senate sponsored resolution criticizing the president for his plans to escalate the number of troops in Iraq. The president has famously maintained his belief in the correctness of his actions despite growing public condemnation, stating that he would stay America’s course in Iraq even if the only remaining people supporting him were his wife and his dog. This position seems to have been dealt a very severe setback on the evening before his State of the Union address.

The first lady appeared in a news conference with Senators John Warner (R-VA), Bill Nelson (D-FL) and Susan Collins (R-ME) to announce their largely symbolic opposition to the president’s plans. This becomes the third bipartisan public condemnation in as many days.

Mrs. Bush stated that she and the dogs would begin an immediate withdrawal and strategic redeployment, returning only when the president is able to step up and make the commitment to govern himself and the country effectively. She cited a specific set of benchmarks and a timetable for the White House loosely adapted from an earlier House of Representatives proposal for Iraq.

A tearful President Bush was seeing leaving late Monday afternoon for for a last-minute trip to Camp David with White House staffers. It was rumored that the president’s State of the Union speech had drawn heavily on his wife and dogs as comic relief in outlining what is largely expected to be a use of domestic issues as a massive distraction from the situation in Iraq. The White House insisted that a major rewrite was not underway, but that the president was merely attempting to make sure that he got this one right.