George Bush And Vladimir Putin Agree: Democracy is for Losers!

Unconfirmed sources report that the Bush, after his summit with Valdimir Putin has decided to implement The Russian President’s leadership restructuring plan here in the USA. People across the nation are greeting the announcement of the American Freedom, Security and Unification Restoration Act with hope and optimism. Retreating from a two hundred year old tradition of democratic rule in the US will open many new possibilities for a county whose two party system is badly broken.

The ambitious new plan will be implemented before the 2006 elections. Under the new form of government President Bush will select the governor of each state. The governor of each state will in turn select the slate of candidates for the November elections to the house and senate. The office of the President will go up for election in 2008 after the initial implementation phase of the new structure is firmly in place.

“I like it.” Said House strong man, Tom Delay. “This is exactly the kind of plan America needs for these difficult times. The ability to totally unify the government under one man will be a godsend to the American people. America will project a strong and determined face to the world.”

When asked how the decision to adopt the Putin plan came about White House chief of staff Andrew Card reminded US of the time Bush and Putin stayed at Camp David together. During the meeting President Bush proclaimed that he had looked into the soul of Russian President Vladimir Putin and found a man with whom he could do business. “It was at that time that two men developed a close and personal friendship. They talk on the phone every day or two, just to keep in touch. The two men really do have a lot in common, so when President Putin told President Bush what he was going to do Mr. Bush decided that he would give it a try. He thought it that kind of government is good enough for Russia it would be good enough for America too.”
Praise for the plan, however, has not been universal. French President Jacques Chirac is not sure it is such a good idea “I’m concerned about the decisions that are being made in America that could undermine democracy in America. Great countries, great democracies must have a balance of power between central governments and local governments,” he said. He also noted a need for a balance of power “within central governments, between the executive branch and the legislative branch and the judicial branch. And that is not what is happening in America. It is a sad day for what is left of democracy in America.”
William Safire, writer for The New York Times, thinks the American Freedom, Security and Unification Restoration Act is a good thing. “I think America has been too hide bound by tradition. We are so wedded to the security of a constitutional democracy that we have ignored the possible benefits of other forms of government. I myself am very excited about the New America. An America poised on the verge of a great empire that will encircle the globe, an America that will eclipse the great empires of Rome, Russia and Byzantium. We just need a leader with the strength and conviction it will take to break us free of the democratic bonds that binds us. George W. Bush is that man.”
The fine details of the plan are yet to be announced, but the time table for implementation is apparently firm.