(O! Online) – White House Assistant Chief of Staff Karl Rove today confirmed that President Bush will be making an appearance on the Recovery Channel’ s popular series Monster Garage. The issued press statement maintains that President Bush is a big fan, and is looking forward to his appearance with custom motorcycle builder Jesse James. The Recovery Channel stated that the episode in actuality has already been filmed and tightly kept under wraps.
In the episode, set to premiere sometime this spring, President Bush and key Cabinet members set out to convert one of the old White House limousines into an armored vehicle, as support for the war effort in Iraq. The premise of the show is that the “build team” has only one week to complete their task, and do so on a very limited budget. For this particular build effort the group reportedly took advantage of a significant “freebie” of humvee up armor which team member Donald Rumsfeld had found laying around.
While the White House, The Recovery Channel, and Jesse James are remaining very tightlipped about the episode, rumor has it that the team was unable to complete their project in the allotted time. As part of the rules of the continuing show, any project which is not completed in the allotted time must be destroyed. Rumor also has it that the president’s “Death Mobile” was spared the traditional car crusher and was taken on a special flight to Iraq where it was destroyed by repeatedly driving it, by remote control, up and down the highway between the Baghdad airport and the United States Green Zone.
A special garage was reportedly created in the White House itself to make room for the build team. An intelligence briefing room was gutted and refurbished as it had long gone unused throughout the Bush presidency. The White House makeover was scheduled to appear as one of Steve Watson’s Monster House episodes this fall, before the series was cancelled by The Recovery Channel.
This appears to be the first in a series of television appearances by key individuals in the Bush administration in an attempt to resurrect anemic confidence ratings in polls of the American public. Vice President Dick Cheney is also scheduled to appear in an episode of Myth Busters where special-effects experts Adam Savage and Jamie Hynemann will attempt to debunk the administration’s justifications leading up to the war in Iraq.