George W. Bush Asks: "Why Can't We All Just Get Along Together?"

United States President George W. Bush, facing plummeting poll numbers on every issue from his handling of the War in Iraq to his plan to gut Social Security, has begun a dramatic turnabout in his dealings with the world in general and the Democratic opposition in particular. In a rare Oval Office interview Mr. Bush was quoted as saying, “You know, every day I sit here in this round room and ask myself, ‘George, how can you make the world a more peaceful, happier place?’

For a president who can’t even spell, and barely pronounce the word introspection, let alone indulge in it very often, the question holds a special poignancy. Obviously stunned that his belligerent and bellicose manner up to this point has not endeared him to any but the most Conservative Christians Mr. Bush, who is facing a three an a half year lame duck term, seems to be going through a crisis of faith. It was just this January when he boasted that he had “political capital” was going to spend it, but now Mr. Bush looks more a man on the edge of political bankruptcy, with Congressmen and the Senators calling for a withdrawal timetable in Iraq, voting against his wishes regarding certain provisions of the Patriot Act and making it clear that they disagree with his stance on stem cell research…and those are just the Republicans.

These setbacks to his bash em and smash em way of doing business are the cause of Mr. Bush’s current feelings of self doubt. It’s actually rather sad to see the man who once issued the cowboy-like challenge to his enemies, “Bring it on.” now going through such angst. In the Oval Office interview, the President constantly stroked a small teddy bear that sat on his lap, once even referring a question posed to him over to the bear, which he then answered in a high, squeaky voice. The ratty bathrobe and miss-matched bedroom slippers were also somewhat disconcerting.

However, this reporter is convinced that the President’s current self doubt is transitory. Given the most meager of excuses, this reporter remains convinced that President Bush will drop the teddy bear and self doubt, mobilize the remaining troops he has left, don a flight suit an get on with the business of attacking the Evil Doers. Then America will be able to get back to the business of Pre Emptive Liberation, Nation Building and the innuendo’s and out an out lies about his opponents that made his first term so much fun.