Heavy Duty Rubber Backed Doormat Favored to Become Secretary Of State!

Unconfirmedsources report the Bush administration is considering two possible Powell replacements. The departure of Secretary Powel has given president George W. Bush the opportunity to interview new candidates more suited to his style of Faith Based foreign policy “leadership”‘. An early favorite is a 19″ x 29” heavy-duty rubber backed doormat with a flocked iris motif, but current national security adviser Condoleezza Rice is also under consideration.

Insiders have been searching for a candidate that can be fit well with the current role of the State Department. Speaking off the record White house staffers have commented “Both Condoleezza Rice and the heavy-duty rubber backed doormat have shown the same attributes and abilities that suited Secretary of State Powell so will inside the administration.

Both have the ability to lie convincing and can do so regularly with out pause. Both have shown the ability to withstand bring repeatedly trodden upon by other high-ranking administration officials. Lastly both seem to have a great desire to lie at the Presidents feet regardless of their personal opinions.

Insiders feel that Condoleezza Rice has an edge in the selection process due to her policy experience, but the heavy-duty rubber backed doormat has shown steadfast resolve in the toughest situations. Again staffers speaking off the record have confirmed the President is considering each candidate on their merits alone.

The heavy-duty rubber backed doormat can be counted on to stay quite and would never contradict the administration. The doormat is a great choice to further the Bush administrations efforts in Darfur, Sudan and the ongoing efforts to repair relations with the inflamed European capitals.

Vice president Dick Cheney, a critic of Powell’s active role in the administration is on record supporting the doormat. “I think doormat will win confirmation once the congress can see how a Heavy Duty rubber backed doormat will do more to spruce up the State Departments image, particularly the front entrance.