Hillary Clinton Still Wishes to be President


Secretary of State designate Hillary Clinton announced today that she still wishes to be President of the United States and she’s hoping that if the three people currently in line for the job pass away after Obama passes away she will automatically be appointed.

“I meant all those things I said about Barack Obama when I was campaigning against him”, Clinton told Unconfirmed Sources. “I want to be the president and I’m only three seats away from it!”

According to the Presidential Succession Act of 1947, the Vice President has the first shot at becoming president if the president passes away, followed by the Speaker of the House, followed by the President pro tempore of the Senate and then the Secretary of State. Hillary hopes that something unfortunate will happen to the congress members in the previous positions which would allow her access to the White House.

During the heated debates earlier this year, Clinton disagreed with Obama on nearly all issues including health care, taxation, capping credit card interest rates, foreign policy and even the kind of car the President should ride in.

“I don’t want that man destroying America and I will do everything in my power to stop it!” Clinton exclaimed.

Clinton later clarified that she doesn’t want to see any harm come to the President or the cabinet members under him but she wouldn’t mind if something did happen to them either.

“Maybe a big bomb will go off when they’re all in the same room together”, Ms Clinton hoped.