Hilton Insists on Early Incarceration

Los Angeles, CA (Rotters) – Lawyers for Paris Hilton yesterday insisted that the the star be allowed to report for incarceration earlier than the propose time one month from now in June. Hilton has threatened the city with a $10 million lawsuit if it will not comply with her demand.

At issue is a new proposed Fox TV reality show called “Jail Life” starring Ms. Hilton as well as her longtime sidekick Nicole Richie. A spokesperson for Ms. Richie stated that her plans to be arrested later tomorrow to coincide with Ms. Hilton’s sentence had been put on hold indefinitely.

A Fox television spokesperson speaking on condition of anonymity expressed frustration with penal authorities over a lack of access to the Century Regional Detention Center in Lynnwood, California, and the 8 x 12 cell in which Hilton and Richie were proposed to spend 45 days. “Lighting and camera angles are not something to be left to the last minute,” stated the Fox spokesperson. “We’re really disappointed with the lack of professionalism here.”

A spokesperson for Hilton stated that millions stood to be lost in the delay of the rollout of “Slamwear”, a new line of clothing and accessories scheduled to be launched with Hilton’s incarceration. The clothing borrows heavily on “correctional orange” color schemes as well as striped motifs. A deal in which fellow inmates would actually stitch the clothing was now in peril.

Hilton’s parents were quoted as saying that the correctional system’s behavior was, “pathetic and disgusting”. Hilton’s lawyer described the situation as, “uncalled for, inappropriate, and bordering on the ludicrous.”