Iraqi Death Squads Release Quarterly Reports : Surge not affecting results

(Baghdad : Ucs News International) Leading Sunni terror group released results for the first quarter of 2007. “We felt with the surge underway in Baghdad it was critical to update our followers.” stated Mohammed Mohammed of the Iraqi Red Hand.

The Iraqi Red Hand death squad has been haunting the streets of Baghdad since the 2005. Founded by an unemployed Sunni military commander, the Red hand has succeeded in the fierce Baghdad death squad market. In 2006 the Red Hand has shown significant gains in productivity and over all killing efficiency.

While the US Troops surge in Baghdad has hampered competitors, The Red Hand’s modern management technique has allowed it the thrive in the ever changing battle field conditions.

In a conference call with security experts Mohammed Mohammed of the Red hand stated, “We are projecting moderate growth in the second quarter. We expect to see deaths per day stabilize at around 65 with increases late in the quarter.”

The Red Hand also confirmed they poses adequate stocks of suicide bombers in reserve and plans for expansion into US markets will proceed in the first quarter of 2008.