It's Official: The FBI Reads Unconfirmed Sources

Dear reader,
For once our sources are confirmed on this matter. The FBI has been reading Unconfirmed Sources and are even now investigating this satirical news source. Our confirmed sources indicate that a story written February 13th, ‘Chillicothe Gets the Bomb’, is the story that has peaked the FBI’s interest. Apparently the FBI is interested in why a certain person is named in the piece. The name has been changed to John Smith to protect the innocent.

The FBI’s interest in Unconfirmed Sources was discovered when Emergency Preparedness officials from the city of Chillicothe Ohio called ‘John Smith’ to inform him that the FBI would be calling him to ask him about why his name appeared in the story. ‘John Smith’, who was not aware that his name had been used in the story, called the Offices of Unconfirmed Sources to better discover the source of the FBI inquiry.

I would like to take this moment to assure the public and the FBI that ‘John Smith’ had nothing to do with the piece and that the piece was indeed fiction, as our disclaimer points out. To remind you our disclaimer reads: “Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.”

An open letter to the FBI:

Dear FBI,
Thanks for reading, we are flattered, but would like to assure you that we are harmless. We feel that we are using satire to explore the issues that face our government and country today and do so with an eye toward educating people in a humorous way.

We are sorry that anything we have written has gotten anybody worried about the safety and security of our country.

About the story ‘Chillicothe Gets the Bomb.’ The person named in the story, whose name has been changed to ‘John Smith’, is a friend of the author of the story and nothing more. I wrote the story and put ‘John Smith’s’ name in it on a whim.

I would be glad to speak you directly about this matter at your soonest convenience. I would also refer you to our disclaimer page and remind you of the disclaimer that appears on each page of our web site.

“Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.”

Sincerely Yours,

Kamal El-Din
Editor/ Publisher of Unconfirmed Sources