John McCain enters 6 month vegetative hibernation

(Phoenix:AZ) Ucs News: Senator John McCain the Republican Presidential nominee has checked into the National Hyperbaric Therapy Center located in Phoenix Arizona.

According Doctors at the center the 74 year old Senator will be placed in a regenerative hibernation state and will not be revived until the week of Democratic National convention.

McCain staffers met with reporters outside the National Hyperbaric Therapy Center to explain the Senator’s decision to enter the chemically induced vegetative state.

Campaign manger Rick Davis stated, “The Senator was suffering from mild exhaustion so it was time for him to have some rest. John, Cindy and I decided the best thing for the Senator would be to take some time off from the campaign trail. He’s no spring chicken you know.”

Dr. Rafel Sims, chief hibernation specialist of the center explained that 6 months spent in the vegetative state will leave Senator McCain refreshed and invigorated.

Republican strategists agree that with Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton’s political struggle dominating the headlines, McCain should be getting some much needed rest ahead of what is sure to be a brutal fall campaign.