Unconfirmed sources report that Karen Hughes, the newly selected under secretary for public diplomacy, has made a strong start at mending frayed relations between the US and the Arab World. Hughes, a long time Bush operative, hosted a Texas style pig roast at the Bush Ranch and invited several influential Arab leaders to the table for talk and a heartily helping of roast pig.
The media was only able to view the event from a distance, but White House officials stated that while the event ended early it went well. Hughes feels that it is important to target the moderate leaders of the Middle East if she is going to convince the Arab world that the US is not a force of evil. Hughes decided to start at the top by inviting Husni Mubarak, Momar Kadafi, Bashar Assad, and the newly elected Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud Abbas to the Bush ranch for a ‘get to know you’ event.
“It was a very good event,” said White House spokesmen Ben Lion. “the talks and afternoon activities were enjoyed by all attendees. The high light of the event was, of course, the pig roast, which we felt was important to build a bond between our Muslim guests and the President. We wanted to share with them some American culture so they would understand us better.”
The barbecue dinner featured, roast pig, pulled pork sandwiches, BLT’s, pork brisket, and a Bush family favorite, pork sausage. The guests where also treated to sweet corn, cobb salad and pork and beans.
“It was a real thrill to see these great men, but I have to tell you they were kind of rude.” Admitted a waiter who worked the event. “I mean they had just set down and started to eat and the President started to talk about the food, then bang it was over. They just stood as a group, spit out the food and stormed off. I think it was some kind of political statement. The President looked mad as hell and threatened to kick their asses if they ever set foot on his ranch again. If you ask me I don’t think it went very well.”
“We’ve got a lot of work ahead us.” Hughes admitted in a press conference back in Washington the next day. “I guess I just don’t understand Arabs very well, you would have thought they would appreciate some good old Texas hospitality.”