Kenneth Lay Beheaded by Zacarias Moussaoui

A video tape showing the beheading murder of Kenneth Lay was delivered to the offices of Unconfirmed Sources yesterday and has since been confiscated by the FBI. The tape shows a masked man identifying himself as Zacarias Moussaoui, the Islamic militant currently facing four capital charges connected with the Sept. 11, 2001 attack on New York and Washington, affirming his involvement in that attack before sawing the head off of the Bush supporter and former Enron chairman.

Because of the graphic nature of the video, it is doubtful that it will be released to the television press, but we can reveal that it was pretty gross. Lay maintained a stoic silence throughout, which the FBI explained to us was, along with the absence of blood, mostly owing to the heavy sedation Moussaoui used to overpower him.

Prison officials are at a loss to say how Moussaoui broke out of his maximum security cell long enough to travel to Texas to commit the heinous murder, let alone how he managed to sneak back in two days later, but the governor vowed not to let current budget problems stand in the way of protecting the public from prison escapees “no matter how much it costs.”

Lay was awaiting trial on a number of charges relating to his handling of the collapse of Enron four years ago. As for Moussaoui, the new charges have forced the governor to accede to earlier requests by the Attorney General to transfer his case to a military tribunal, where public scrutiny and the rules of evidence will no longer impede his swift and just execution. Some questions still puzzle investigators, such as motive and who was holding the video camera, the fact that the murderer seemed to be tall, thin and left handed, his British accent and expensive jewelry, but the FBI assured us that the limited access to legal defense would prevent Moussaoui from exploiting the apparent weaknesses in the prosecution’s case.