Summerville, NJ (Rotters) – Pet lovers were dealt another severe blow today as thousands of dogs across the nation became sickened after their owners had apparently purchased Michael Vick Chew Toys, over the internet. No deaths have been reported as yet, but veterinarians have been deluged with what appears to be minor to occasionally severe cases of lead poisoning.
Owners report that the cheaply made toys, apparently manufactured in China, suffer from peeling paint which their animals tend to swallow. An analysis of the paint has revealed unacceptable levels of lead according to FDA sources.
A spokesperson for the online distributor for the toys stated that sales were already being halted secondary to complaints from NFL marketing and the Atlanta Falcons over the depiction of Vick in his Atlanta Falcons uniform. Lawyers for the NFL had seized and assumed possession of all stocks of the toys as well as all profits. The spokesperson directed that all complaints from pet owners should now be directed towards the NFL.
The Chinese minister for commerce stated that it had already conducted an investigation into the plant which hand painted the suspect toys and all involved were subsequently executed late this evening.