Michelle Obama Discovers Dress Makes Her Look Fat


President-elect Barack Obama’s wife Michelle suffered every woman’s worst nightmare after Tuesday’s election when she discovered that the black and red dress she chose for the occasion made her look fat.

The color combination of red and black was entirely inappropriate for TV cameras which made it appear as if she was either fat or pregnant. Ms Obama strongly refuted such assertions.

“I am neither fat nor pregnant”, she told Unconfirmed Sources. “I will never wear that dress again. If I knew it made me look fat I would have worn pinstripes!”

“It also made her hips and ass look huge”, said Vice President elect Joe Biden’s wife Jill. “She almost made me wish I had stayed home!”

Biden’s wife was dressed in a figure flattering gold outfit for the occasion.

This has been the first major embarrassment for the future First lady though, undoubtedly, there will be many more.

“I don’t want people looking at my husband thinking ‘oh, there goes the guy with the fat wife'” Ms Obama said in reference to her husband Barack.

Ms Obama says she plans on hiring a fashion consultant for all of her future public appearances.