Microsoft, Inc. announced today that their Internet Explorer (IE) browser is a flawed piece of crap and computer users should switch to Mozilla, Opera, Google Chrome or some other web browser.
Microsoft officials admit there are dangerous security issues with IE that would enable even the simplest minded hackers to easily access credit card numbers, passwords and any kind of vital information, even if that information has been previously deleted. They also warn that anyone who uses IE may lose everything they own including their home, car, furniture and electronics, including cell phone and computers.
“We tried but we can’t patch all those holes in IE no matter how hard we try”, said Craig Mundie, Microsoft CEO. Before becoming Chairman after the retirement of Bill Gates, Mundie was the Chief Technical Officer for Microsoft.
“I encourage all readers of this article to switch to Mozilla. It’s a lot safer”, Mundie continued. “I see no reason to use a flawed piece of shit like IE when there are much safer alternatives. I don’t even use it anymore. It’s a piece of crap”.
Bill Gates, the former Microsoft Chairman, said he knew from its inception that the IE browser was seriously flawed and he has never used it for anything, especially for downloading porn.
“Porn sites are always trying to get at your personal information”, Gates stated. “I encourage people to use some other web browser for downloading porn