Unconfirmed sources report that North Korea has developed a nuclear weapons delivery system capable of striking the continental United States. Kim Jong Il, the beloved leader of North Korea, made a rare public broadcast this morning to show the world that North Korea has well and truly joined the nuclear club. With the development of the new delivery system North Korea now has the ability to produce and deliver a nuclear weapon to anywhere in the world.
The new system, which consists of a B40-237 seagoing freight container and bill of lading, makes North Korea a truly dangerous foe. The B40, which looks like any other freight container, because it is just a regular freight container, is cheap to build and very tough to stop. The B40 has the added benefit of being highly accurate. Experts estimate that the B40 with it’s current guidance system could be delivered to within 20 feet of any address in the United States.
“The B40 is a very dangerous weapon.” Explained John Kensington of Jane’s Defense Weekly. “This device is cheap, accurate, and most alarmingly, deploys stealth technology. The B40 can blend in with the thousands of freight containers shipped each day all over the world. It would be an easy thing to slip the B40 onto a container ship and sail it right into the Port of Los Angeles or even New York Harbor. And because the B40 is nuclear capable all you have to do is get close. The B40 is truly a terrifying weapon of mass destruction.”
US leaders in Washington are in a panic over what to do about the B40. The President has rushed back to the White House from his Crawford ranch and is at this very moment waiting for Dick Cheney to tell him what to do.
Donald Rumsfeld has put off his early retirement plans and is already designing a military plan to eliminate the threat posed by North Korea.
Even the CIA’s Porter Goss, who has been caught sleeping at the switch, has sprung into action. The CIA has released newly post dated intelligence reports indicating that the development of the B40 is well along.
The world is now holding its breath. Has the B40 already been deployed? How many of the dastardly devices are there in transit? What will the governments of the world do to protect the citizenry? With the development of the B40 the world is truly a more dangerous place.