Paris Hilton's Advice To Donald Rumsfeld: "Don't quit. You're Hot!"

(Los Angeles–CA) During a break from promoting the latest season of The Simple Life, Paris Hilton found time to offer words of encouragement for Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld. “I may not be the brightest bulb in the drawer,” said Hilton, “but even I can see that Donald Rumsfeld knows how to kick booty.” When asked what advice she would give Rumsfeld during this trying time, Hilton was quick to respond. “Don’t quit. You’re hot.”

The comment seems to have found the right ears. President Bush mentioned Hilton’s comment Tuesday during his Rose Garden press conference, when Democrat Congressman Harold Ford, Jr.’s suggestion of replacing Donald Rumsfeld with Colin Powell was brought up. “If it comes down to listening to an elected official or an American, all I have to say to Don Rumsfeld is, ‘Don’t quit. You’re hot.'” A follow-up question by CNN’s John King asking if the American to whom the President was referring was Paris Hilton was answered by President Bush in a style that proved he had lost none of his press savvy. “Now John, I can’t tell you that. Who do I look like, Scooter Libby?” Bush then quickly retracted the statement. “I have the highest respect for Lewis Libby. For what’s happened, who can plame him?”

During an exclusive IM interview with Hilton, Jade Berko, of, asked Hilton about President Bush’s remarks. Hilton texted the following response. “First, I’m really pleased that the President thinks I’m hot. I think he’s hot too. And I’m not just saying that to be polite, because he said ‘you’re hot’ first. Second, when you’re hot, well, you’re hot. And Donald Rumsfeld is hot.” Hilton then cited a tragic example from her own life. “It’s like with me and Nicole. We split. But can I call her a slut? Well, yeah. But because she’s hot, I can’t tell her to quit The S Life. Hang in there Mr. Rumsfeld! XXX00.”

Calls to Donald Rumsfeld’s office were met with the following statement. “Secretary Rumsfeld values the opinions of all citizens. But he is standing a little taller at his desk thinking of Ms. Hilton. And while he has not seen The Simple Life, he has seen some of Ms. Hilton’s other video work online. And Secretary Rumsfeld would like to take this opportunity to say to Paris, ‘Don’t quit. You’re hot.'”

Neither Nicole Richie nor Colin Powell were available for comment.

If you want to reach Ed E, e-mail or visit Attic Witt