Pat Robertson Rebuked by God

Unconfirmed sources report the All Mighty Creator that is Lord our God is upset with Rev. Pat Robertson. Seeking to distance himself from the controversial television evangelist, the All Mighty Creator that is Lord our God has denied he spoke to Pat Robertson about the President of Venezuela, Hugo Chavez. “I have commanded Pat to ‘Stop the crazy talk in my name and I have dropped the ratings of the 700 Club.

The All Mighty Creator that is Lord our God went on to say “Yes, I told Pat the war in Iraq was a bad idea. This is true, in fact I told just about everyone that was listening the war in Iraq was a bad idea.” “I also told Pat to ease up on the feminists because women are also of my creation.”

Apparently , Pat Robertson has been at odds with the All Mighty Creator that is Lord our God for some time. “I was backing Pat in the early days of his ministry but then he started praying for some of my other creations to drop dead, like Liberial judges and left wing politicians.” A Vatican official speaking off the record explained that Hugo Chavez, the democratically elected President of Venezuela, is also one of Gods creations and therefore should not be killed on the command of man.

“I have asked my new Pope to look in on Pat but even Benedict XVI thinks he has gone over the edge.” Others close to the All Mighty Creator that is Lord our God suggest the plans for the Rapture have been significanlty changed in the past few years. Study of the freshly leaked draft of the “Rapture go list” shows that Pat Robertson has in fact been removed and replaced by registered Democrat David Green of Chillicothe Ohio.