Unconfirmed sources report that the President has hired the outspoken Internet character Avery Ant to be his new spokesmen. Avery Ant is a surprise choice as a spokesmen, but more than one Washington insider is calling the selection bold, decisive and completely inline with new Bush agenda.
“What a savvy move.” Said media and Washington watcher Brook Gladstone of NPR’s On The Media. “If the President is going to sell his agenda to the youth of America then Avery Ant is just the Ant to do it, even if he is a Canadian. This is going to be a tough job, it takes a special kind of guy to stand in front of the camera and lie to America. The President can do it, but he is going to need more help, now that Colin Powell is leaving.”
“I think the fiery little guy is just the sort of spokesmen the President is going to need during he second term.” Agreed Andrew Sullivan. “The President is going to be neck deep in scandal during his second term and an Ant like Avery could really help smooth the way by acting as a lightening rod. With such an inflammatory spokesmen the President himself is going to look down right moderate.”
Mike Erskine-Kellie a long time Avery friend and confidant of Avery Ant speaks very highly the little fella. “I’ve known Avery since he was just a pupa. Right from the start I knew that he was meant for something great. You could tell he wasn’t going to hang around the colony; he had more drive and talent then all the other ants in the place. As a spokesman for the President