Unconfirmed sources reports that a draft list of White House officials to be pardoned by the President has been leaked to the media. The list of names was leaked by secret White House source Wegman (Pudgy) Waterhouse and was immediately picked up by the national media. White House officials deny the existence of the list and further claim that it is incomplete and that the real list is much longer.
“With all the trouble facing Bush Administration insiders it comes as no surprise to me that they are already thinking ahead, but letting this list out is a real blow to their credibility.” Says Washington insider William Krystal. “I mean what does Cheney need to be pardoned for? That is the real question. These guys have some guilty knowledge and I bet Fitzgerald is going to take a much deeper look now that this list is out.”
White House spokesmen Ben Lion spoke to reporters today and strenuously denied the authenticity of the list.
“Lets be real people! What kind of pardon list wouldn’t include Wolfowitz, Rice, Rumsfeld, and Bolton.” said Lion. “This list just isn’t credible. I wish you guys would think a little harder about this stuff before you waste my time asking stupid questions. The real list is much much longer, includes people from every department and several more cabinet positions. When you guys get a copy of the real list