Sarah Palin Endorses Alaska Toilet Seat Law

Still feeling flush with power, Alaska Governor Sarah Palin is pressuring the Alaska legislature to pass a law requiring all male household members to put the toilet seat down after using.

Since the invention of the modern flush toilet by male inventor Thomas Crapper in 1882, women have complained that the toilet seat is decidedly ‘male friendly’ and requires extra effort for a woman to use.

“We have suffered under the tyranny of men for too long!” Palin addressed the legislature. “How many women have to fall in and be humiliated before this law can be passed? How many times must we put the seat down ourselves?”

Women all over the world cheered Palin for promoting passage of the new law. Not all men were as enthusiastic about the requirement.

“I’ve been hearing this crap my whole life”, said Wasilla bartender Josh Calderon. “How much effort does it take to put the seat down themselves? She won’t put it back up for me!”

Former Montana Gov. Judy Martz, a Republican, cheered Palin’s initiative. “Finally we have a woman who will address real women’s issues!” she stated.

Under the new law, any man who leaves the toilet seat up once could be given either a verbal reprimand or a $25 fine. A second violation would result in a $50 fine. Three violations or higher could result in a $500 fine per violation and/or 6 months in jail.

Alaska lawmakers were attempting to draft a compromise measure which, in dual sex households, would require both a toilet with a permanent seat and a urinal and/or a bidet that would be strictly for female use.

California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger claims that if the law passes in Alaska it would set a dangerous precedent for other states to follow suit. “Let my wife put the freaking seat down herself”, the macho governor declared.