Washington, DC (Rotters) – Controversial Hollywood star cum stripper, cum Playboy model, and now possibly cum millionaire was seen leaving the Supreme Court yesterday with Justice Antonin Scalia after a unanimous ruling by the bench in her favor. Nicole Smith’s lawsuit to attempt to recover millions from the estate of her former husband J Howard Marshall was given new life largely on the basis of a technicality.
Justice Antonin Scalia was seen to rush after her as she exited and proceeded to thank her profusely on the court’s behalf for allowing them to render a decision and to be of service. He then kissed her hand in courtesy and offered a few Sicilian hand gestures in greeting to the assembled crowd before he offered a statement.
“This is a classic case in American jurisprudence,” stated Scalia, “There are millions at stake here, as well as the very fabric of the law. I really don’t need to say it but “torturous interference”, is a serious violation of the law and this must be played out in the courts, no matter the cost. The Supreme Court looks forward to assisting both sides as need be in making sure that this plays out completely and all fees are settled up in a timely and equitable fashion.”
Scalia was questioned as to the possible impropriety of the contact with Ms. Smith and he responded: “Nonsense. My interest in this instance is purely for the law. While Ms. Smith is an admittedly buxom and attractive young lady, I would recuse myself in an instant over any sort of base, libidinous intrusions into my thought processes… and I think Ms. Smith knows in her heart that her trust in me, and in the law, is well funded… er… founded.”