State Of The Union: George W. Bush Issues A Stern Warning To John Roberts, Samuel Alito.

Wednesday, February 1, 2006

In a dynamic State of the Union Address, United States President George W. Bush called upon the Supreme Court not to attempt to overturn Roe V. Wade, the landmark abortion case. The warning came in the form of Mr. Bush’s welcome message to the Courts two newest members, Chief Justice John Roberts and regular Justice Samuel Alito. In his greeting to these two men, the President once again reiterated his conviction that judges should not “legislate from the bench”, clearly implying that Roe v Wade was the law of the land and has been for thirty years and any attempt to change it would be just that…legislating from the bench, I mean.

The President’s Conservative Evangelical base immediately expressed shock and dismay at Mr. Bush’s new, Liberal stance. Christian Coalition leader Ralph Reed, whose support was critical during the last re-election campaign immediately issued a statement calling on Mr. Bush to atone for his sins or face the Fires of Hell. The Reverend Jerry Falwell also added his voice to the growing chorus of dismay saying, “Did I say Chavez? I meant Bush. Next to Chavez, Bush is Ariel Sharon.”

Unnamed White House Source Wegman (Pudgy) Warehouse, speaking on the condition of anonymity said, “Look, I know that in the past George Bush seemed to lean to a more conservative viewpoint, but what people don’t understand is that he only did that because he needed something to set him apart from his Liberal friends. It’s just politics, really. I mean, there was John Kerry, Howard Dean, even John McCain