(Washington D.C.) Unconfirmed sources are reporting that the Trump Administration has approved the sale of the U.S. Government to the US Chamber of Commerce. The deal struck between the Trump Administration and the Chamber should close in late 2017 for an undisclosed sum of money. The transition from civilian to corporate control of the government should be completed by 2018, when the Chamber will appoint a new president.
“I can’t tell you how excited we are at the Chamber are about this deal,” confesses Chamber President and CEO Thomas Donohue. “We have been working on this deal for years and to have the court finally approve it is a real milestone in the history of corporate America. We have big plans for the United States Government.”
The deal approved by the Trump Administration requires that The US Chamber of Commerce and its three million member businesses pay an undisclosed amount of money to elected members of congress and local governments to facilitate the transfer of ownership. After the agreed payments are made the formerly elected officials will become contract employees of the Chamber and will manage the U.S. Government on the Chamber’s behalf.
“The change is not really as big as it sounds,” says Chamber COO David Chavern, “We already influence the elected members of the government through political contributions and lobbyists. The new system just makes the control of the U.S. Government by corporate interests more transparent, which I think everybody will agree is a good thing.”